Tuesday, November 27, 2007

Answers and Talents....

I stood up and looked toward the room on my left. There was a kitchen in there. I closed my eyes to breathe a moment and then it happened.

I could see the room, wait, could see him in the room. He stood at the counter, his hands over his eyes, shaking his head & muttering. I opened my eyes and realized I was still standing where I had been. I had not followed him. How could I see him? What on earth..? I closed my eyes and thought about the kitchen.

The vision opened again; there he was getting a glass of water, he found some bread and cheese in the pantry. He turned to head back toward the door. I opened my eyes again. He had re-entered the room.

His face was expressionless until he saw mine.
"What happened? Are you okay? You are so pale?" He quickly sat the food down on a table and hurried over to me.

"I am fine. It is nothing. Just hungry. What did you find?" I am not sure why I did not tell him what I had seen.

"Some bread and cheese." He obviously did not believe me. But for my sake he let it pass by. Perhaps he is as tired as I am.

I dove into the food. A strange sensation came over me after a few bites. I literally could feel my strength coming back. My body tingled slightly and when I drank the water my eyes began to produce a few tears and I could tell my skin was no longer dry. There began a pulling on my ankles and feet, only a slight sensation, but enough to make me look.

I almost dropped the glass as I watched the scratches heal, leaving smooth perfect skin in their place. I pulled up my skirt and saw the deep gashes in my knee just before they healed as well.
The man had stopped moving beside me, his eyes were wide, he put down the bread and began to slip away from me.

"How? You cannot be.. it is not possible. You are just supposed to be a girl from the village. YOU CAN'T BE HER!!! Oh no. What have they done? You are not Ariana, you are... you are.." His questions spilled out so quickly that I almost could not catch the words. He had stood up and began to walk a small circle. He had said I was not Ariana.
"Wait. What are you talking about?" I tried to interject but he had begun to ramble.
"They thought you were just a maiden, just a girl, someone from the village. No one that would cause a stir unless they needed you to. Oh how could this have happened?" He stopped and stared straight at me, then dropped to his knees.
"I am so sorry. They were never supposed to have done such a heinous crime. They were merely trying to help the other villagers." His head was bowed and he began to wring his hands.
"Sir, I do not know what you are talking about. But I do know that my wounds are gone. I don't know how, but they are gone. I also know that I can see things that I don't think a normal person can see. Do you have any information as to why I can see these things? Or how I just healed without.. well how I just healed? Who am I? Please help me."


Okie said...

Intriguing story. Nice writing.

Southern Princess said...

Okie - Thank you! I am quite surprised you found this site. I have a main blog and created this one for fun when I was working on a story line. I need to upload some more snippets to this one.

I appreciate your comment - you are welcome to visit my other site anytime:


Bethany Wiggins said...

One comment... in your second to last paragraph, you write that he was "So distressed." Show us his distress... "His head was bowed and he was wringing his hands..."

Nice writing!

Southern Princess said...

Bethany - thank you so much - I took your suggestion and love the change! I am so glad you discovered my two blogs! I have got to revisit this story and finish some more posts! ;o)

I just slipped over to yours and love it! yay! so glad to have found you.

francescbb@hotmail.es said...

Great blog!!! Fantastic!!



TheLittleFlower said...

This is awesome! I love your writing!!

Roland D. Yeomans said...

You are growing as a writer even in the midst of this blogfest. Congrats. I believe I got in too late to participate myself. That'll teach me to drive rare blood all over Lousiana, right?

Happy that you got in. May publication be right around the corner for you, Roland

Creepy Query Girl said...

I liked this scene. The premise made me want to keep reading to find out what was going on. Be careful of 'do not' / 'did not'. I don't know what time period your story takes place in but out of dialogue, those tend to trip up the flow of a piece.

Courtney Barr - The Southern Princess said...

Thank you all for the comments!!

This is a WIP that I work on when I can... I will be sure to update as soon as I can! ;o)

Renae said...

Love the writing and the blog! I just started following.